As a mom of two kids, I have always heard talk about post partum depression. I have also experienced it with both children and it has been a tough and at times even unbearable weight on my shoulders. It can make you feel as though your crippled by saddness and anxiety. When you have a new baby it is the worst time for this awfulness,as it leads to guilt and also frustration , which definitely make things worse.
BE KIND TO YOU
My advice to you to you momma is to not be so hard on yourself. If you feel you are struggling with PPD. Please go to your doctor and get help and service possible. There are plenty of medications that you can take and if medication is not your thing therapy should help to. Of course I am NOT a medical doctor and I’m not really qualified to give medical advice except for the fact that I have had two children that have been through this twice. The first time I tried to pretend that it wasn’t a problem and I put on a show for everyone. I’m not sure if anyone knew that I was actually suffering on the inside. I look back now four years later and I really wish that I would have gotten some help. Even if the help was only talking to a friend. I feel like in those days PPD was something that wasn’t really addressed I heard some about it but I felt like it was still kind of taboo. I always felt guilty like it was my fault and I had done something wrong . But now years later I realize that it is not something that we can Necessarily control. And it is even something that happens to many women. Apparently you’re more susceptible to it if you have any previous history of depression.but the amount of helpful resources out there is so abundant there’s no reason to not seek help. When I was at my worst with PPD I would shut myself in and keep myself away from people. I’m here to tell you that being by yourself is the worst even if it’s just a walk outside get out there go do it. It doesn’t really matter how new your baby is you could go for a walk outside and not have to worry-about germs and such. Fresh air is great for mom and give you a fresh perspective. I would NOT recommend taking a new baby to Disney World or a shopping mall but a nice walk outside in your own neighborhood or even at a nice park would do you wonders. If I could go back and do it all over again, I would probably go for walks every single day and I darn sure definitely would have gotten to a therapist. I do not like taking medicine, nothing wrong with anyone who does take medicine for depression but it’s just not my thing. When I was a teenager I was put on several different antidepressants and all they did for me was make me angrier at times or just even more depressed. But I also have a few friends who take antidepressants and they’re totally fine and they say that it’s the perfect solution for them. More power to them if antidepressants worked for me I would take them to. Motherhood is a journey at times it is so tough but believe me it’s all worth it just like they say. The trick to it is finding ways that make it survivable . This can seem impossible when you have PPD but believe me it’s not. It’s also a good thing to have the support of you were’s palace or significant other. remember this, if no one knows that you’re suffering that no one can do anything to help you and you don’t need to fight your battles alone. One of the biggest mistakes I have made throughout my life is I always think to myself that I have to fight my battles alone. And that is just not true. Friends, family, significant others, therapists, pastors this is what they’re here for. They’re here for us when we need them and then we are to be there for them when they need us. I just wish that more people understood that including myself. But I have definitely learned that that old saying is so true,” hindsight is 2020″. It’s so easy for me to give you advice on something that I am no longer currently dealing with. I feel like when we are in the storm it’s so hard to see our way out. But once it is past we look back and wonder how did we ever get caught so hard in the storm anyway. Just hold on tight mama. Remember that this storm will not last forever, before you know it life will be back to normal it may seem like an attorney but trust me. It will happen :-).
When I was dealing with PPD, one of the hardest things that I had to go through was not having the energy to care for myself let alone my child. This didn’t happen every day but when I did it was so crippling. And the guilt from that was insurmountable. And by no means am I saying that I didn’t take care of my child because of course I did but on those days I just could not get the energy to move it when I finally did move I felt so Chain, if you have ever dealt with PPD then you know what I mean. And then when my child to finally go to sleep I would just cry and cry feeling so guilty that I couldn’t wait to get them to sleep. And then I would feel like I would give anything for them to wake up so I can somehow love them and take care of them right. When I had PPD one thing I never struggled with was loving my children. That has never ever been an issue the problem comes more so of having to be able to quiet all the negative thoughts that acompany it. PPD has this way of making you feel like you are in capable of anything and you’re the worst. PARENT.EVER.but I want you to remember even on your worst days that you are definitely not the worst parent ever, in fact you’re far from the worst parent ever. In my opinion the worst parent ever would not give a flying bleep if they were a good parent or not they wouldn’t even have any concern they would think that they were the greatest parent. Next time that you were questioning if you are a good parent or not I want you to ask yourself these three questions :
1) do you care about your children?
2) do your children have a home to live in?( even if it’s not your own home it still counts)
3) do your children have food?
4)are u trying?
If you answered yes to at least three of these questions or perhaps all four and yes you’re a good parent and stop being so hard on the self. As parents I feel like they make things way more complicated than they need to be . Parenting is supposed to be a fun time, I know that he can get extremely stressful believe me I know having a four-year-old and a.m. 18-month-old. There are times when I want to just rip my hair out. But there are also many more fun times that would not even happen if I didn’t have the two of them. I think God for them every day and I’m here to tell you that the good times definitely outweigh the bad. And you need to remember that PPD does not last forever. Postpartum depression is just a phase while you’re going through it it seems like an attorney but have faith that it will not last forever. Journaling definitely got me through this crazy time and now when I read back on my entries I can’t even believe we’re the same person . Postpartum depression just has that much of an effect on people. But I can’t stress enough how temporary that it was. In life we see seem to tend to feel like bad times will last forever just hang in there and remember before you know it this time will be over so enjoy each season because each season is wonderful in its own unique way and each comes with a challenge. Besides enjoy the baby days because before you know it they’re going to be a angry teenagers LOL.
I want to and this entry by just reassuring you that you are a good mother and you can do this. Just the fact that you are reading this wanting to know more about postpartum depression would tell me or pretty much anyone else that you’re wanting to change so great job momma. I would also like to take this time to address the issue of postpartum psychosis. I have never dealt with this issue and I don’t know much about it, but what I do know is that a serious issue with a mother wanted to harm her baby I strongly urge you that if you are having any thoughts to harm you baby or yourself that you call 911 immediately. Do not risk hurting yourself or your baby it’s not worth it. No matter how much a baby cries for how hard they may seem to take care of that’s no reason to harm the baby and if you’re feeling so overwhelmed that you feel these thoughts or feelings please please please get help.
As always thank you for reading and I hope that this helps someone