Saturday of underwater discovery

During a trip to the aquarium. My 3 & a half year old daughter had an accident and what her pants. We were looking at the Stingrays and I was trying to get her to pet one and she started screaming screaming saying I have to pee two seconds later she says I peed myself LOL. While using the blow dryer in the bathroom to dry her pants and panties I was thinking about how funny day-to-day life is with young children,  when they’re doing ridiculous things. Things  such as yelling and screaming on the bathroom floor while I blow dry her clothes LOL. As parents,  as  I’m realizing that we should always find a reason to smile even in the most annoying situations of children not listening there is joy to be had. Normally when she is screaming her head off I would get angry and upset but on this day I didn’t maybe it was all the blow drying not sure the hand dryers they have now are pretty fun. You know those hand dryers that you have to put your hand in and out of slowly but you just can’t stop playing with it. During our visit to the aquarium she had alot of fun, but being that we went around her nap time, I didn’t really expect her to behave. We got to the aquarium around 2 p.m. she loved looking at all the fish but she didn’t want to have the patience to watch and see them do things she loved looking at all the fish but she didn’t want to have the patience to watch and see them do things. She would love seeing animals such as the nurse sharks and she would be excited for approximately 3.4 seconds and then she would want to go to the next exhibit quickly though when I say quickly I mean the she ran and left us all in the dust. Of course it was just me and my sister-in-law with the four kids, so it wasn’t as easy to deal with Ferrari as it may have been had my husband have been there. At one point she started to say that her legs were broken and she needed daddy to be there to carry her. I love my daughter but sometimes I get so frustrated at how quickly she throws tantrums when things don’t go her way but something that I’m starting to think about a lot is that don’t we adults also throw tantrums when we don’t get our way?Maybe not in the way of jumping up and down and screaming but we do get angry and we don’t get our  away some more so than others. Who doesn’t like to get their way. So as I was blow drying her pants to dry the wetness from the accident I started to think about what if I viewed life from her perspective that she just gets upset when things don’t go her way and the only way she knows how to express herself is by screaming and jumping up and down. Sure this is not the ideal way for one to express themselves but come on she is three and a half not 30. I am 26 years old and I know that when I don’t get my way I throw a tantrum sometimes I let it even ruin weeks of my life. A perfect example of this is the past month I’ve had a lot of days where I didn’t get my way and all I’ve done is throw Tantrums and then been sad and mopey. So instead of jumping up and down screaming I just let myself sink into a depression and whine about everything. If you will, I did my own form of jumping up and down. Sure this is not the ideal way for one to express themselves but come on she is 3 and a half not 30. I am 26 years old and I know though when I don’t go get my way I throw a tantrum sometimes I let it even ruined weeks of my life. A perfect example of this is the past month I’ve had a lot of days where I didn’t get my way and all I have done is some tantrums and been sad and mopey. So instead of jumping up and down and screaming I just let myself sink into a depression and  it was just as destructive if not more so I am going adult I should know better. My main thought in that bathroom stall was that if I viewed Ferrari more as a struggling child than a bother maybe I would be able to deal with her more easily children are not depressed not really feeling up to par. This has taken quite a toll on me in my day-to-day life when I am depressed it makes it nearly impossible to do anything. I feel as though my depression was directly caused by letting myself get upset by not getting my way I guess you could say that I did my own form of jumping up and down and screaming. depressed not really feeling up to par. This has taken quite a toll on me in my day to day life when I have to press it makes it nearly impossible to do anything. I feel as though my depression was directly caused by letting myself get upset by not getting my way I guess you can say that I did my own form of jumping up and down and screaming. The main lesson that I realized well blow drying her Penneys in that bathroom stall was that I need to try to view her more as a struggling child that I created then a  burden. And I’ve actually been reading a lot about this lately on Facebook. A few different parenting pages that I follow have been discussing how it is our duty to help are struggling children. And I think that a lot of times we parents seem to just focus on the negative things our children do and just get stressed out and burdened by it such as when they throw Tantrums my suggestion in the suggestion of others as well is that we focus on the positives and when they’re upset we try to see what we can do to help rather than focusing on punishment. Not saying that punishment isn’t a good idea but when all you’re doing is punishing and never rewarded what is that teaching the child that they’re determined to be punished forever. The main point of this is that this moment of reflection made me realize that Ferrari and I are actually very similar and that when she is upset I should just take a moment to help her figure out what’s bothering her and find a solution rather than reacting by getting  angry and punishing.

Today has been a very good Saturday. It started with me letting go of my depression and deciding to make today a good day. I know that when one has depression, it’s easier said than done Today but I believe if you try hard enough you can push the feelings aside and fake it it till you make it as fly lady would say.

Sneaky depression Saturday

Today I am having issues with depression . It’s like everything is making me sad . No matter what I try I still find myself sad. Sure maybe I can just snap out of it. YEAH RIGHT! Get real . If people with depression or any other mental disorder could just snap out of it they would. No none just enjoys being miserable.  Today we are celebrating Uncle Dan’s birthday.  So we should all be having a great time, we’ll except me. It’s nothing anyone did or anything it’s just that seemingly Neverending sadness of depression.  When I have thease days it feels like I will never be happy.  I feel like the most terribke wife/mother on the planet, but that is so far from the truth . Life is so beautiful, we just need to find the beauty in each moment even the days like this when it’s tough for me, I force myself to be positive and that is what eventually pulls me out of it. Even though sometimes it may take a few hours or even a day or two I work at it and always come out of it! It just is not an instantaneous process. Man I wish it was though! I am happy to say that thease days get to be fewer and fewer as time goes on. My husband is a huge reason for this . He always there for me every step of the way. When I just want to give up he’s there telling me to pick myself up and keep going. “You Got this!”, He’ll Tell Me Despite My Anger . He puts up with my sometimes very venomous tongue. He forces me to relax. He forgives me when I snap from time to time. But most of all, he accepts me as I am, with out expecting me to change  and that’s an awesome feeling. That’s love! Without my wonderful partner days like today would probably turn into weeks and months maybe even years. As I right this entry , I feel better and better.  There is something so freeing about sharing this with the world . It helps in a way to ease the sadness.  To bring light to the  darkness. Maybe it even helps me to see the truth through the lies that depression tells the mind.

As I sit here with sleeping baby Jr, watching Ferrari play, it reminds me why I do everything in the first place.  My children.They are my motivation.  Although they are extremely stressful at times they are worth every moment of it.

Today we went walking on some trails and Ferrari was really hard to deal with, as was teething baby fussy pants. I made the mistake  of telling her we were going to a park. She kept running ahead of everyone (which is SUPER  dangerous in a place like we were with snakes etc ) and when I got on to her about it her reasoning  was that she was trying to find the playground. Needless to say, when I told her there was no playground she just about lost her mind! In turn I just about lost mine.my first response despite my anger (still working on my patience , which needs a lot of work) was to simply talk to her. I used to spank but I don’t believe in that anymore.  It never did anything anyway, aside from hurt her feelings . I want to teach her right fromnwrong not teach her that the ones that keep jer safe wikl hurt her . Whenever  I tried to talk to her, she responded by hitting me and digging her seemingly claw like nails  into me. Instead of losing my cool I just took a step back.  It was so hard to do, but the last thing I want to do is respond in anger in the moment. I tried again and again to get thru to her. Over and over she did not listen.  I am proud to say that after about an hour I finnally got thru to her and she was listening to me! It was so awesome I felt so good.  PATIENCE WAS THE KEY! I even asked her how she felt about hurting mommy,  to which she responded in her sweetest little voice, ” I’m so sorry mommy “. Of course I forgave her. I want to teach her to forgive.

Now she is playing being a kid and I only hope that she will show others the forgiveness I show her. I. Thease days where I struggle in this  battle with depression, I find comfort in knowing that I matter to someone. There are two little people that are counting on me and think the world of me. On thease days where I don’t love me, knowing that they do makes a world of difference. Today  I am learning that if I could see the world a little more through my children’s eyes I would probally be alot happier. They are so young and free.  They don’t get stuck in the negatives, they get lost in the moments and leave the world behind! Have a great weekend  everyone!

What a crazy day of murphys law moments!

Let me.start off by saying today was not necessarily a bad day,but it was definitely one of those where Murphys law  (what can go wrong will) was I’m full force. As soon as I was was liking out my door on the way to Sams Club and I spilled pineapple juice on my lovely Darth Vader Tee I knew it was that kind of day. You know the kind.  It’s the kind of day where no matter what you do little things don’t seem to go right almost to the point of whereby contemplate going back to bed and starting the day over. It’s the small things going wrong that can ruin a day fast if your let them. But we didn’t!  I just laughed them off as best I could. Did I get frustrated?  Sure you bet but I refused to let small mishaps ruin a perfectly good day.

I left home I went to our local Library first which was fun. Until I realized I owed over six dollars from late charges incurred MOSTLY when I was sick with pnemonia. 🙂 Of course I was upset for a moment till I looked at the bright side. I could afford the late fee and the money would go to a great cause, improving our library  RIGHT ON.

Part two of today’s adventure was the wonderful joys of Sam’s Club. Of course by the time we get to Sam’s I’m not even sure why were there. Oh yes nkw I remember Pizza! When I grab a cart for my stuff I attempt to put on Junior’s cart cover thing which of course takes me what seems like forever. Where are the straps? Oh man! There at home. Well alot of good that does. Oh well the bright side was I just threaded the sams straps threw NOT A BIG DEAL. When we were waiting on out pizza of course Ferrari was in the shopping cart saying “can I get out” for 20160330_125522 20160330_125612what seemed like a million times, even after I said no. We all know that stage , the repetition even after we’ve said no, in fact especially after we have said no. But guess what instead of losing my cool I just dealt with it and laughed at her even when she almost threw the pizza in the floor. Hey, kids are programmed to annoy us it’s part of their job and a large part of ours is to learn patience. That’s a lesson I am still working on. Today  was a big lesson on it.

Oh the park. We had a great time there. Everything  went right at the park! It was a great day for the park! Junior loves to swing , if you let him he will spend an hour in the swing, he’s done it several times. 20160330_125707

 

It’s amazing how peaceful the park can be even when all seems to go wrong. Today was tough with both kiddos being sick and myself, but here you can’t even tell. Of course there was one meltdown. I have a three year old princess so I think it is to be expected. She absolutely lost her mind about wanting to go in the baby swing. Which if course she asked me about right as I told my husband we were about to leave. When I said no she asked him and he put her in not realizing I just said no. This is her new thing. She’s a very smart girl way smarter then your average 3 year old.  When mom says no she just asks any other adult around.Oh this really tries my patience! And perhaps on another day I may have yelled at her, but on this day all I could do was laugh.

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But all I could honestly do was laugh. Let’s be honest wouldn’t we all rather laugh at our kids them yell. I hate yelling it gives me a terrible feeling but it happens sometimes.  My goal is to make those times less and less.20160330_131401

This photograph of my son and husband was one of the highlights of my day! Lately I have been thinking it would be Awesome to get into photography as a hobby. I think I could be really good at it if I worked at it.Maybe one day I will take a class on the subject.

I even managed to take a nap during this day where so much went wrong. Also so much went right. I woke up before the koddos so I was able to cook dinner. I made some homemade fettuccine alfredo sauce to go with my honey lemon pepper chicken. It was so delicious! While I was cooking dinner of course I was so clumsy.  Jr was asleep in the living room. So of course , I had to make noise. RIGHT? ? I must have dropped a dozen things. I also managed to knock over a container of odds and ends straws and binkie etc ,stuff I need to go through.  I was so upset and then I just laughed it off. It took all of two minutes to pick up but it was still frustrating. Then when dinner was almost done WAaaaaAAAHHHHHHH! Anyone who had kids understands. Whenever you are really trying to get something done the kids will always wake up from a nap.  But did it ruin my mood? NOPE!

Bedtime was very easy. Hubby handled it and I passed out. Until awakened a few  moments ago by my screaming little guy:) . I sure do love him though.

The moral of this story is that

Today was a great day, not because everything went right (because it certainly  did NOT) , but because I choose to make it great. Each and everyday we have a choice to make the day great! Everyday is a Great day! I plan to make sure tommorow is even better. We only get a certain amount of days so why waste any being miserable!

What a day!

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Hello everyone .  This is my first post so let me start by introducing myself  . My name is Angela  I am 26  and I have two children  I have a three and a half year old daughter  and a nine month old baby boy .  I think it can go without saying that I have my hands full. I am nowhere near a perfect mother in fact I am the imperfect mom hence the name of this blog. I hope that you can find some enjoyment in this as well as hope, laughter,inspiration  and maybe even just a way to pass a few minutes time thank you for visiting. I will try to post blogs as often as possible and I’m going to do them on a variety of topics but mostly on parenting and also caring for ourselves . I am also going to make posts about different activities I try with the kids or maybe even come up with. Enough about the future for now lets talk about today, So today both of my kiddos are sick.  We made our second (Or was it the third? I really don’t know. Lol.) Trip to the doctors office. This time however, my little girl had a temperature  of 104 and of course the doctor was very mad at me. THE IMPERFECT MOM.For not giving  my three year old tylenol.  Well give me a break lady !Our appointment was at 9:50. We woke up around 9 watched, some Daniel tiger and took a bath and of course left the house five minutes before we had to be at the Dr. No harm came to my daughter  having to have a fever for an hour. They gave her Motrin at the office.  And let’s be honest,  if she would not have had a fever the doctor would have just said that she was fine like they did on Friday, when she was definitely not fine. I don’t know if any of you have this problem but my children have a really great doctor the only problem is that whenever I take them in and I think they are sick the doctors always try to say they are fine and just to take them home give them Tylenol and make sure their noses are clear. This is extremely frustrating especially when I know that there is more than that. I get that the doctors don’t want to just write a prescription for antibiotics  right off the bat Because they don’t want for them to be over them I totally get that . But honestly all they do is tell me to come back in 2 weeks !2 weeks!  2 weeks seriously?  Let them be sick for 2 weeks then do something about it. I just don’t get it! When a child is sick and they need antibiotics they need antibiotics plain and simple there’s no way around it. Just recently I had mycoplasma pneumonia I don’t know if you all are familiar with that but it is also known as walking pneumonia but it really got me bad I must have had the flu or something and I didn’t go to the doctor. Next thing I knew I kept running a 103 degree temperatures for a few days and then I started have trouble breathing when I finally went to the hospital the doctor said that I was lucky that I went when I did otherwise I could have possibly died because both of my lungs were filled with pneumonia. Nonetheless I got to enjoy a 3-day stay in the hospital. This was a few weeks ago. I am a pretty much recovered now. My dear husband just went to the hospital this past Wednesday and lo and behold he also had micro plasma pneumonia go figure. So when my children started to act sick I took them to the doctor on Friday and made it clear to her that the pneumonia was going through I told them it was also very contagious. But you figure that they would know this since there a doctor but whatever let’s not get into that. I am happy to report that my son is feeling better he is still coughing a little bit and you can tell he’s congested but definitely better than yesterday so that’s progress. My daughter is also doing better she is coughing less but the doctor gave her cough medicine too and she has not had a fever since this morning so I am assuming the antibiotics are working No in fact I am praying they’re working because I definitely do not want to have to watch my children suffer with pneumonia that would be awful. No mother wants to watch their children suffer with a sickness. Well I’m sure that I have not handled the situation perfectly I’m proud of myself for being there for my kids when they needed me and taking care of them the best that I could. Even if that meant feeding my daughter pretty much just popsicles today because she has no appetite at least she was fed and she ate some chicken nuggets and mac and cheese for dinner that’s good and I have been breastfeeding my son pretty much constantly all day it helps to comfort him. I’m proud of myself as a mom and I’m not going to let anybody tear me down or let me feel like I am unworthy. Each and everyone of you are good mothers everyone parents in their own way as long as you put your children first and you do whatever you can to keep them safe and happy you’re doing a good job keep it up.